Fresh off colleage, one of my dearest friends told me:
“You graduated from school very recently and a whole new world opens before you. That’s why you are scared. But you must also remember that you are young. You’re at the age when future is unpredictable. The repetitions bore you. The unexpected awe you. So be worried, but be happy and enjoy it too. For one day your future will no longer be a shrouded mystery full of possibilities. One day your future will be reduced to a plan, when surprises mean bad news and all you will be looking forward to is an endless circle of every day activities.”
I was 22 and that guy was twice my age. What a pessimistic son of a bitch he was. Or was that a reflection of his own life?
It has been many years since my graduation. I was no longer a fresh graduate. My current life has been much less “The Catcher in the Rye” and much more “The Great Gatsby”.
Some years ago I made the stupid decision to take in a little teeny tweeny tiny bit of responsibility. I then realized responsibilities would not leave you when you want to. It gathers its friends and piles up on you over time. I also started to make serious commitments. I would regret it soon for life only sells those commitments in bulks.
I stopped treating my full time job as something I could leave at any time. I learnt later that quitting out of a whim is indeed no longer an option. I am carefully considering having a stable income instead of freelancing and doing odd jobs to earn money. Like a real adult should.
Yes, I’m making plans, trying to stay away from surprises, and looking forward to repetitions. After so many years, I finally decided to grow up.
It’s not that fun most of the time, but sometimes you don’t do the fun thing. You do the right thing. Stupid, right?